Cajun Mutt Press Featured Writer 11/11/22

The Burden

Yes,
you are a burden.
Neither you nor I
can change that.

I’m afraid.
My back will go out
and then what?
Who will lift you out of bed?

Heard me curse,
pushing your chair
up the ramp into the van,
hitting my head on the door frame.

Said I wasn’t bothered
when you released your bowels
in your shower chair.
I was lying.
You knew.

Yes, you are a burden.
I won’t say it out loud,
but please recognize,
it’s my honor to bear your weight.

You apologize.
I’m always driving you
to your medical appointments,
run out at all hours to the pharmacy.

Who taught me to drive,
kept your signature cool
when I stomped the gas instead of the brake,
rounded State & Pearl, tires squealing?

Who cut short Florida vacation,
drove 900 miles north,
to gray ice New Jersey,
to visit me in rehab?

Who always had a kind word,
when I had none
for myself?

Yes, you are a burden.
Now take my arm.
I’ve got you. I’ve got you.

Jason O’Toole a member of the North Andover (MA) Poet Laureate Committee, was an original voice in the NYC hardcore punk scene. He published two volumes of poetry, a chapbook, holds an MBA from St. Joseph’s College of Maine, and a BA in Social Theory from The New School. He was the vocalist with Life’s Blood and is currently recording with members of Siege, Kilslug and other bands we won’t mention.